New Year gatherings can be tough for families with teens
New Year isn’t just a festive table with Olivier, it can feel like a marathon of family dynamics over a long weekend. If there isn’t time to plan ahead for entertainment, and a week with children or teenagers stretches ahead, it helps to prepare practical steps beyond just hoping for smooth days.
Speaking from a mother’s perspective with two teenagers, aged 19 and 16, the truth remains constant: the holiday routine shifts no matter the age. Whether six or sixteen, holidays bring late mornings, constant snacking, and long stretches on devices. The difference lies in the options available to channel energy. With younger children, outdoor play is easier to arrange; with teenagers, the challenge shifts to finding activities that feel meaningful to them and respect their growing independence.
Teenagers often enjoy activities that simulate autonomy, like asserting themselves as capable adults. Yet this does not automatically translate into responsible chores or household cooperation. Alcohol use can surface during holiday periods, which is a concern for families. It is important to acknowledge these moments honestly and prepare discussions and boundaries in advance. This reality is not unique to any one family and is something many parents encounter as children begin to explore more adult experiences.
A classroom teacher friend routinely reminds parents in December to have conversations about growing up, independence, and potential risk factors. Two-thirds of parents find themselves surprised by how quickly teenagers mature and seek experiences beyond familiar routines. Some respond with denial, while others choose to engage: thankfulness that the moment to talk has arrived and a plan to support healthy choices.
Growth is not a gendered process. Boys and girls alike can move toward more independence during the holidays, and both deserve understanding as they navigate new boundaries and expectations.
Events like December 31 can reveal how a teen’s living situation feels when unexpected changes occur. January can bring a realization that a familiar child is evolving into someone who needs more space and different kinds of support. A once predictable schedule can become unpredictable, with shifts in mood and behavior that require patience and empathy.
When life hands lemons, the response can be lemonade. If the long weekend means time with older kids, it’s worth trying to open channels of communication and understand their world. Conversation helps, but so does shared, low-stakes time at home. Consider pizza and a movie, or turning off phones for a few hours to play a board game or enjoy a team video game session. The goal is simple: rebuild a sense of family and remind teens that their voices matter. There may be a moment when they see their parents as a source of support rather than an obstacle, and that chance should be valued because it might not come again soon.
What else can be done besides talking and playing? Giving space can be equally important. Holidays bring fatigue, and teens also face tests, exams, and hormone fluctuations. The pressure on both sides can feel intense. Sometimes a quiet pause is the best approach—the teen will reach out when they’re ready and feel understood enough to reconnect.
One piece of personal wisdom carried into many holiday seasons is to pay attention to the teen’s needs. That attentiveness often makes the difference between a tense break and a period of genuine connection.
As memories of childhood performances fade, the scene shifts. The writer recalls moments at sports events: crowded support from parents, grandparents, and siblings cheering every move. As teams grow older, the crowd thins, and the support dynamics shift. Yet support remains essential. Even as teens thrive on independence, steady encouragement helps them stay grounded and connected. The long weekend with Olivier might become a turning point, a chance to strengthen those bonds when the family needs it most.
Ultimately, the perspective here is a personal view and may not reflect every editor’s stance. The hope is to offer a grounded, practical guide for navigating holiday moments with teens, balancing autonomy with care, and keeping lines of communication open for a healthier family dynamic.