“Just kidding”
At the start of summer, a biology teacher from a Moscow school approached the movement known as Surrender the Pedophile. The movement’s leader, a lawyer and clinical psychologist, reported that the teacher had shared concerning observations about her then-15-year-old student, Nicoletta.
“Nika began drawing in pairs and in groups, a change from her usual behavior, and she started scrawling sad faces on pages of the tests she was given. Soon the word “help” appeared in large letters on a notebook page,” he stated.
The teacher invited her daughter to chat and noted on paper that her husband had abused her at age 14. It later became clear that during the harassment, the girl had resisted the abuse and even struck her abuser. When Nika told her mother what happened, the mother reportedly replied that she was “just kidding.”
“During the conversation with the teacher, the girl was so overwhelmed and frightened that she could not express what was happening. The teacher promptly contacted our service, and while efforts were made to secure Nika’s protection from the family, the school administration learned of proceedings that had begun.
Moreover, the staff did not back the teacher. They criticized him for not reporting first and threatened to involve guardianship authorities. They even pressed him to leave voluntarily. A call was made for a discussion with Nika’s mother, who immediately mistreated the boy on his return home. That same night the girl attempted suicide in front of her mother, and no ambulance was summoned, according to the claim,” the movement’s leader added.
As a result, emergency services took Nika from the school after a call from the biology teacher. She was moved to a rehabilitation center, where she has remained for several months. Psychologists have worked with her for over six weeks, and officials now await her return from the center to pursue a criminal case; meanwhile, guardianship authorities are handling related matters.
“Relatives continue to insult Nika and her friends, labeling the girl a prostitute or a lesbian. This is only a censored portion of the abuse she endures online. Nika fears returning to her family, but authorities and the Children’s Ombudsman in Moscow are not abandoning the case. She now receives support from the rehabilitation center and fellow girls who have faced similar situations as she learns to live again,” the leader of the movement stated.
“I will talk to him and he will not do it again”
From the group Hand Over the Pedophile, it is claimed that up to 60 percent of child sexual abuse cases occur within or near the family circle, including fathers, stepfathers, older brothers, uncles, and other relatives. The psychologist notes that similar statistics appear across many civilized nations.
“The core issue is that in nine out of ten cases the child attempts to speak with a parent about the abuse, but the message often goes unheard. The pattern is usually that the child discloses soon after the event or within one or two months, while others minimize the harm and place blame on the child rather than the abuser,” Levchenko explained.
She argued that mothers may avoid public scrutiny, fear losing livelihood, or worry about social consequences if the abuser is jailed. Common responses include, “I will talk to him and it will not happen again.”
“Two days ago a relative contacted us for guidance. The niece told the caller that her mother had endured long-term abuse by someone living with them, and when she reported it, the daughter claimed she just wanted to argue with a friend and was jealous. The aunt spoke with the mother, but the discussion did not help. The woman eventually chose to contact the Investigative Committee and filed a statement,” the expert recounted.
The expert noted that parental indifference often drives children to seek help from other relatives, friends, or even social networks. In marginalized families, parents may overlook their children’s words.
“In many cases, a normal mother shows no awareness of the danger. The child may sense something is wrong, but a good parent who stays connected will notice changes in behavior and ensure help is available. The child will signal distress if trust exists,” the leader insisted.
How to recognize signs of abuse or exploitation
Child and adolescent psychologist Anfisa Kalistratova identifies a risk group among children who are more likely to face violence. The research examined past cases of abuse and their contexts.
Both boys and girls may be at risk, typically those who are quiet, obedient, and rarely voice their own opinions. In families with such patterns, caregivers may use authoritarian styles of parenting.
“A child raised to accept authority without question may lose the ability to respond critically in dangerous situations. This makes it harder to seek help in cases of abduction or abuse,” Kalistratova explained.
Predators tend to target children who are more approachable and less likely to resist. They avoid noisy or outspoken youngsters, since those children often seek help more readily.
Early warning signs include behavioral changes: the child becomes notably quieter, unusually compliant, experiences nightmares and worsened nighttime wetting.
“These signs are not always obvious in daily life, but with careful observation they emerge. If a child suddenly pulls back from certain relatives and stops greeting them, that should raise concern. Sometimes the reluctance to engage comes from the child’s own fear of triggering trouble at home,” the expert warned.
Marina Gladysheva noted that adults can also show warning bells through behavior toward children. A sudden, unexplained interest in spending time with a child or insistence on private moments can signal risk.
“Look for evasive answers about activities, a desire to be alone with the child, or unusual reasons to spend time together,” Gladysheva added.
What to do if abuse is suspected
Gladysheva advises trusting the child and listening without judgment, even if the claim seems unlikely. Delays or denial can worsen the situation and erode trust. If doubts arise, seeking professional help is wise.
“If the child says everything is fine, there may be trust issues or fear. It’s not just about what is said but the relationship built during times of reassurance and support,” the psychologist explained.
The persistence of doubt requires actions by parents: limit contact with a suspicious adult and monitor the child closely. If improvement is seen, the concern may be less severe.
Kalistratova cautions that such contact might occur over months or even seasons, making assessment difficult. A formal evaluation by a specialist can confirm the child’s psychological state and reveal any harm endured.
She also emphasizes allowing children to interact with other adults if they wish. If a child prefers not to greet someone, that choice should be respected. Healthy relationships at home help the child feel secure, making it easier to report abuse when it happens. Trust between parent and child is key, and protecting the child’s safety should always come first.
Ultimately, the focus remains on fostering open communication, safeguarding the child, and ensuring timely support when warning signs appear. The goal is to empower families to respond swiftly and effectively to protect their children—before harm deepens.
[citation: attributed to public statements by the referenced movement and participating professionals.]