People under a lot of stress tend to notice their partner’s negative behaviors more than positive ones, compared with others. This pattern appeared in a study by psychologists at the University of Texas and published in Social Psychological and Personality Science.
In the study, researchers followed the daily diaries of 79 newly married couples for ten days. Each diary captured daily notes about the partner’s actions, the participant’s responses, and everyday problems. At the outset, participants completed lists detailing recent stressors (such as the loss of a loved one), and they assessed self-esteem, attachment style, and neurotic tendencies.
Results showed that husbands reported acting negatively toward their partners on 19% of days and positively on 87% of days. Wives reported negative behaviors on 25% of days and positive behaviors on 91% of days.
According to the researchers, husbands and wives also reported receiving negative feedback from their partners on 24% and 22% of days, respectively, and positive feedback on 87% and 91% of days, respectively.
The study found that people who had recently experienced stressful events were especially attuned to their partner’s negative behaviors, compared with those who had experienced fewer stressors. However, when positive behaviors were considered, participants tended to underestimate or overestimate their partners’ positivity in the relationship.
These findings offer meaningful insight into how perceived stress relates to partner behavior and could help couples understand dynamics that emerge under stress. [Attribution: University of Texas researchers, Social Psychological and Personality Science]