What is modern relocant nostalgia for?
with birch trees? Along the rivers? By the width of the streets? According to the Stalinists? In the Moscow courtyard? For patriotism? Cyrillic?
Birch is a grass tree, in folklore it is not entirely clear where it came from. They are full of both Canada and Germany. There is no special Russian birch.
Well, okay, but then why is the displacement nostalgic?
Yes, according to MFC.
Do you like MFC and utilities? Passionate loves, like their displaced love, who left their homeland, which now becomes a problem that answers every bureaucratic step with toothache and bone ache. They have also heard of the “single window” system in foreign countries here. But I just heard. It will never be here. Everything will be uncomfortable, as in Moscow. Here the protests are interchangeable, here they can even overthrow the government, but only the silent (languageless) immigrants know what and what to protest against: yes, for the MFC, for comfort and dignity in the face of bureaucracy, as frightening as an old pagan god.
Oh MFC, oh you beautiful and perfect one-stop shop!
A man stands in front of this palace, which is now in every micro-region, and when he sees the white bride, he blushes and smiles like a groom. Here, in a single palace full of lights, a thousand ministries and hundreds of thousands of officials are tamed. The minutes, hours, days and years stolen by the bureaucracy were returned to the person. The man got half of his life back. Gorgeous smiling fairies at the reception desk greet a person and give him a magic trick for absolutely any question. And any certificate that until recently took time, effort, humiliation, will now suddenly appear out of nowhere, and a smiling attendant will lovingly hand it to you in the hopes that you can put a smiling smiley face on it.
New license? at our pleasure.
International passport? Yes, please, at least three.
Certificate of non-conviction? On two accounts.
Call to the military branch? In the best electronic form.
Online entrance to universities has now been added.
And all this in one place. Utilities and multifunctional centers – modern branded birch of Russia, matryoshka 2.0.
Hatred critics say public services and the MFC have made the country the most comfortable prison in the world. But every vindictive critic admits defeat – “the most comfortable in the world”! The point is, while the conflicts continue, while the Russians go and stay, those who go find a job according to their liking and argue among themselves to the death who is a “good Russian” and who is a “good Russian”. not – in Russia, especially in Moscow, Sergei Semenovich finally built communism.
Yes, Moscow has always been a showcase – sometimes socialism, sometimes Stalinism. Feuchtwanger famously came here in 1937, glorifying the USSR, and no matter how we despise him for deliberate blindness, he left a testimony: “Public buildings are monumental, and thanks to electrification, Moscow shines at night like no other city in the world.”
One was missing. And it turned out.
The “My Notice” app suggested itself, well, it suggested itself. Of course they did. And I must say, it gives hope. At first glance, this is a parody of public services playing with its logo. But “My Notice” is a parody of everything at once. If you search for news on this topic: fake articles and reviews – there are jokes and, of course, live informants without them.
A relocator (name unknown) created the “funny” “My Notice” application, created in 2018, but the resource had not yet become popular, closed it. However, it opened again in 2023 and the reports were not coming to an end. The app has been downloaded 10,000 times. He wrote 5,000 notices. Someone writes that up to 20% of the reports are written seriously.
Not all – only 20%! Only a fifth were written by quarrels of all kinds: against neighbors, ex-cohabitants, unfaithful husbands. That is, within eight months from the start of the application, only a thousand people without a sense of humor described in detail the action of the “violator”, posted their personal data and links to accounts on social networks.
I remember how shocked and devastated we were when we heard a story about a now deceased acquaintance who was in occupation during WWII and told his wife he was Jewish. He was shot. I remember the numbness you felt when your head encountered something you couldn’t name. In a tragic tone, I retell this story to my editor, who put together my film featuring this interview. “Maybe he wasn’t Jewish either…” he snapped, too indifferent to be imitated.
Maybe he wasn’t Jewish.
Or maybe it wasn’t just any dissident, this man, a citizen of the Russian Federation, Mikhail S., to whom his ex-girlfriend wrote six denunciations at once in her denunciation application.
The rest of the notices and reviews are a pleasure to read – people are having fun and keeping up the irony. Yes, it’s definitely a great app. But sometimes, for example, you urgently need to write a notice, but at the same time you have to run and testify to the previous one. It would be nice to include standard templates in the app so that in time pressure you just have to enter the name and submit. And enter only the full name and signs of violation, for example, the tags “hipster”, “read a lot”, “not our person”, “alien”, “chatter”. In the future, you need to connect the AI.
The author expresses his personal opinion, which may not coincide with the editors’ position.