The newspaper “Arguments and Facts” published an article about the sad fate of women who had a mortgage during the holidays. It turns out that the mortgage is a serious obstacle to marriage: burdened brides do not want to get married. The sad trend was confirmed in the article by various experts: lawyers, psychologists, potential suitors. But comments from readers on social networks have become much more interesting. It’s incredible what fears the article brought up among people, how selflessly people rushed to write horror stories about treacherous mortgages. What’s this? Lack of critical thinking and lack of understanding of the legal aspects of marriage? Or is there a deep folk truth that the mortgage is really some kind of evil monster that is destroying the institution of the family and undermining demographics?
In fairness, it is worth noting that not only mortgage women, but also mortgage men become undesirable spouse candidates for the average person. Many women also admit that they do not want to connect their lives with a man who owes several million. It is believed that if the chosen one does not have his own home, it is better to take out a joint loan while married. The legal norm that all mortgage payments paid during the marriage are considered joint, regardless of when the loan was taken out, and can be divided in case of divorce, does not console doubtful women. Actually, just like men. This norm somehow seems to pass through the consciousness of our citizens, which is expressed in comments like: “Yes, pay him together, then only his and your apartment, after repaying the loan, you will simply be thrown out like a kitten”
But there is something else. This is a feature that makes women with mortgages even more terrible in the eyes of the cowardly man in the street than knights of the same kind. We are talking about a possible maternity leave.
Here the fears of potential suitors are inflated beyond imagination. Moreover, these fears are diametrically opposed. Some are afraid that a woman with a mortgage will not give birth at all until she pays off her loan – you know, leaving the unfortunate child-loving Vasya without an heir. Others shudder at the thought that the newly-made spouse will begin to give birth as if from a ball, and not only will this whole flock have to be fed, but she will also pay off someone else’s debt like a fool.
You read this and never cease to be amazed. And questions continue to multiply in my head. How can people transform their thoughts into such complex combinations? Who are they, these strange people, and what do they have if they are ready to run away from those who are not afraid to take on the responsibility of independently solving the housing problem? So who are these frightened comrades looking for and what can they themselves offer to their possible halves?
It seems like life always offers many options. It seems that these options are always subject to many conditions. But come on, life mortgaged in the mass consciousness is still a dead end full of all dead ends, the curse of curses and a situation from which there is no chance of getting out. Suddenly.
It looks like a man met a woman. So he pays his debt. Somehow I managed to do this, put in some effort in life, saved for a down payment, earned an income that I could give a certain amount to the bank, and maybe even did some repairs. Well done, right? He paid all the bills himself before meeting love, and probably no force majeure will happen to him from now on. Unless this force majeure suddenly happens to be the chosen one himself. What’s wrong with your mortgage? And here everything seems to depend on the groom’s own plans and abilities. Where would he and the woman live, earn money, and run a common household, so to speak?
Let’s say the groom has his own apartment. Great! Nothing prevents him from inviting his wife to his home, as tradition dictates. And the mortgaged apartment can be easily rented, then the rent itself will pay off the loan. Yes, most likely the income from tenants will cover obligations to the bank. Our women are mostly very cautious creatures, they prefer to take a loan with a maturity of 30 years, but with minimum payment. And if the mortgage was taken at good rates three to five years ago, before the next rise in property prices and the increase in inflation, payments have already become very expensive in modern times. And by the way, the option of renting an apartment also eliminates problems with maternity leave. You can even see advantages in mortgages from a reproductive perspective. Here is a woman with a studio who does not interfere with anyone, who buys herself, who sooner or later gets bought out, becomes property, and then has something to leave to the children.
It’s another matter if the groom does not have his own house. But you know, options are also possible. We won’t say that someone who doesn’t have an apartment is a bad candidate for a husband. But of course the man will have to catch up a little with his chosen one and equalize their positions. Yes, he is not the one who is “not in debt”, he is the one who is naked as a hawk. Let us remind you that the woman has already achieved something, but the man has not proven himself in anything yet. So let him also get a mortgage – what’s the problem? More options are still possible. Either the young people return to the man’s land, even if it is mortgaged, and the woman’s flat is rented out again, or, if it is more convenient, they live with the woman and the man’s flat is rented out. If everything goes well for the couple, both loans will be paid off over time and the second apartment will be left to the children. If family life does not work out, everyone will move on with their own lives.
Whatever one may say, there is room for suffering only in one case: when a person has nothing and nothing in sight. Maybe his credit history is completely ruined and he can’t get anything from any bank, maybe he has a criminal conviction and swore twenty years ago that credit slavery is not for him, the damn capitalists can’t make money from it. not even a penny. An independent woman with a mortgage is hardly suitable for such a fairy-tale character. This man needs to look for a modest bride who wants to move into his and his mother’s two-room apartment of 42 square meters. Of course, it is inconvenient to have children there, but it is a known fact that people live in shared apartments, but when there is a lover, the hut is heaven. Of course, one can still imagine the heir of a large Stalin building in the historical center. But just imagine, because it is absolutely incomprehensible why the owner of a good apartment would need such a worthless treasure.
Honestly, there doesn’t seem to be any other plans here. Starting family life in a rented apartment is also such an idea for a groom with limited abilities and, most importantly, limited thinking. If it’s painful to feed bankers, what’s it like to feed bourgeois speculators who buy investment homes from others to make a profit? And how can you come to terms with the idea that no matter how much you pay, rental housing, unlike mortgaged housing, will never be yours?
In general, it somehow turns out that it is not the mortgage that undermines the institution of marriage and prevents the development of all kinds of demographic phenomena. It is the inertia of thought, the irrational fears, the general distrust of the world, life and people that destroy everything. The economic component is still strong, of course; the notorious poverty of the population. But again, poverty is often associated with psychology. The first does not come from the second; Rather, we are talking about phenomena that are interdependent and trapped in a vicious circle.
A known phenomenon: Some people with modest incomes, but who are patient, trust each other and believe in their own strength, create families, combine potentials and aspirations instead of capital and assets, and ultimately achieve a strong position in this life. true prosperity, while others either do not even see the opportunities that come to them, or even dismiss them as terrible horrors.
The author expresses his personal opinion, which may not coincide with the position of the editors.