This book, violet hour, Sergio del Molino (Madrid, 1979, but from Zaragoza) is an embrace and shudder read with an emphasis on pain and understands the pain that must be felt, as if it were ours. nature comes in and leaves you an orphan your beloved sonEven during the terrible nights of insomnia brought on by impotence, you laugh together, look at your wife (Cris in this case) and disappear like lightning for both of you.
to interview him A book like this, so autobiographical, so realIt seems as if it is necessary to look into the eyes of the author to confirm that there are no longer remnants of the past in the gaze, but that it is present, like the book, so instead of questions we should prefer to hug.
Sergio del Molino is, in any case, the author of many other books, some of which are as decisive as ‘Empty Spain’, ‘The Leather’ or ‘Un tal González’. He seems to have known how to summarize the autobiography in a way that adopted other proper names, other episodes that were already part of his own life. good literature And the journalist must say it from his extraordinary heart because There aren’t many people like him in this profession. so supportive, so loved.
The journalist read this book, ‘violet hour, The tenth anniversary edition was published (like many of his books) by Alfaguara; He underlined almost every page, as if underlining would make it more durable, more necessary. memory who claimed this? This Sergio del Molino underlined, messy hair over eyes that seem to be colored with words, curiosity, but also joy.
It was as if I was reading the book with you and underlining it.
Books are made of life, they are like underlining life. It is difficult for me to separate literature from life. I learned what I know by living and reading. Paul’s death [su hijo] It was a very painful experience that led us to silence and destruction, and at the same time, I understood the silences within. Deadly and pink, The book he dedicated Paco Threshold to the death of his own son. I discovered his pain through my own. This sequence was like a very determined catharsis to find the tone it was supposed to have. Violet hour.
Did another author or another person prepare this book for you, or did events change you?
The facts are beyond doubt. The book is a reflection of the transformation and change that can no longer be the same as before, and how I look at the world from a different perspective. Writing this felt like a natural action on my part, but it was often difficult. In any case, it’s not a painful article. What hurts is the experience, telling it.
I am not a coward and I think if I were I wouldn’t be the writer I am today.
Will the pain go away?
No, the pain transforms, takes shape, metabolizes, transforms into itself, but the real pain does not decrease. I believe that such pain will never go away; There may be other pains, but these pains do not go away. The pain of a child’s death never goes away.
How have other people’s books helped you?
They helped me feel like they were accompanying me. I believe it is very important to feel accompanied and understood when I am suffering and see my experience being glorified in others. It helped me a lot. I think that’s the great power of literature, and that’s what some people can see in literature. Purple hour… You don’t feel comfort, but you feel companionship, you feel that you are not disconnected from the human condition, that you are still part of the species, and that there are others who express those abstract emotions much better than you. They are beyond you, you don’t know what to do with them, and so you feel completely alienated… Literature, to a large extent, puts you back into the human species, into that flow from which pain and trauma have pulled you. at some point. This is a power that music also has, but in a more primary, more emotional way…
It is difficult for me to separate literature from life. I know that I learn by living and reading
Is the music you work on a lot with Pablo a form of literature?
If I knew how to make music, I wouldn’t do literature. I envy music. If I knew how to make music, I wouldn’t do literature, which is something you do because you can’t make music. That’s why I love incorporating this into my books. But I don’t even know how to sing!
He admits this in the book…
I have a good ear, but I’m not good at interpreting, and I could hardly scream… No art has the power that music has. While literature requires intellectual mediation, decoding, music requires abstraction, silence, intimacy, as if directly into the bloodstream. But I like my books to resemble music as much as possible and to have a similar effect to music.
It is impossible to get pregnant hour violet without the music it contains…
Yes, there is usually music in all my books; Sometimes it’s complicated, because music is a landscape, a reflection of moods, and in literature it always works in a very similar way to cinema… I believe that Spanish literature in general seems quite deaf and quite silent. insensitive to music. For me, it is important that books have their own soundtrack, so that the reader can leave the book and seek out familiar and non-literary songs and sounds until the book has a more intense presence in their lives.
How was the next book born after this book?
The following article was quite reserved. violet hour It actually made me less humble. It broke through all the barriers of humility and made me understand the power of autobiographical literature, the power of the self, the power of the first person… If it weren’t for this trauma, if it weren’t for this experience, I would never have felt the need to describe it this way. If I had exposed pain in this way, I would not have discovered the tremendous power of nakedness. This form of immediacy allows you to tell the world with a minimal anecdote. And I wouldn’t have discovered it without this book.
What kind of person has this ongoing event made you?
It is difficult to separate the person and the author. I think it permeates and conditions the gaze; In fact, I sometimes think my political views are filtered through this experience. I think this book and its contents helped me sort my priorities in life and separate the important from the accessories. In other words, the ethics and aesthetics I use in practice come from there, so my novels, essays and columns are shaped according to this situation, even if unconsciously. empty spain It is present in this experience, a self-criticism of what I did before… For example, I was unfamiliar with 15M; It happened when Pablo was hospitalized and I was out in the world. When I went out, I saw that politics had changed, suddenly there were people who had nothing to do with politics and suddenly there were people who looked like Lenin. The fact that such a significant social and political transformation was not there, not there at that moment, is largely indicative of later attitudes. And this is also seen in literature.
The great power of literature is that you feel companionship, that you feel not separated from the human condition.
Now, when I started reading the book, I decided to underline it. I asked myself how I would do this, according to what criteria, and underlined almost everything. What would you underline? Purple hour?
The problem is, I can’t answer that because my job is to cross out and cross out and cross out. I can’t underline, I underline. I cannot read this book as if it were someone else. Yes, I was able to highlight the thing about Threshold, Deadly and pink, Without pity, because the books you highlight so much seem to have been mistreated. I feel like the more I bash a book, the more I praise the author.
The boy was Pablo. It’s always Pablo. That kid is still there.
Often everything that happens becomes valid because of its meaning, because of what it continues to be. For example, when I write about illness or about health, when I write about my own illness, my son appears in thousands of corners, he is a normal presence in my life, in our lives. Sometimes these are the highlights that come to my mind from that time and the writing of this book.
There is a lot of coldness in the book. The bitter cold of the world. There is also fear, the roots of fear were in that cold.
To a large extent yes…
Has writing made you lose your fear?
Fear made me lose my fear. I don’t think I was drowning in fear. This is a feeling that I rarely feel anymore… I am not a cowardly person, and if I were, I think I would not be the writer I am today, that is, I would not dedicate myself to what I do.
The writing of this book will be different from the previous ones, the coming ones, and the ones to come. How are you doing as a writer after a book like this?
I suddenly found myself in a serious situation, but I never abandoned irony or even sarcasm. violet hour While some readers may find this surprising, it is also laced with humor and irony. In this way, the serious tone I subject myself to breaks at some point. I no longer see myself as the frivolous writer I used to be, and I feel like I can no longer be a superficial writer, which I would love. Life and the books I love added a different tone to me and took me to other lands. This was not a decision: it was imposed. I wish I was less serious than I am.
What was the writing process like? Did the events occur simultaneously or later?
I always took notes. It was not a systematic diary, but a diary consisting of notebooks filled out with no intention of providing narrative coherence. Then I sat down. These notes formed the main core of the book. The decisions I make have nothing to do with facts and memories other than the command I give them.
If I knew how to make music, I wouldn’t do literature, which is something you do because you can’t make music.
What happened, Paul’s death, the book that came later… Everything must have been done by someone else…
Completely. I don’t recognize myself as the person I was before. There are even friends who cannot overcome that obstacle.
There is great sensitivity; You are afraid to be alone with the child, but you try to act like you don’t care. This loneliness must be indescribable. Approach him.
Especially in the beginning, the first weeks are the hardest. I think it’s an experience all parents in my situation share: rising to the occasion, pretending you can handle a situation when you can’t. You don’t know how to fix what seems like a sinking ship. This vanity takes most of your energy and prevents you from breaking down, because you have to be there, because you have no alternative… You can’t run away, you can’t delegate to anyone… You can’t. Give yourself the luxury of denying anything and everything, not being around anyone and not having to explain anything… You have to get back on your feet: this is imperative and the hardest thing in the beginning.
His wife, Cris, the child’s mother, is there, she is a castle.
Everywhere, always there… Now the book has gotten better, ten years later the book I wrote back then, the book we lived together and is now ours, life got better over time and it is gone. set invoked text violet hour, continues to accompany us.